Mother’s Day. Why I will celebrate and why I will cry.

 

family pictures017

My beautiful mom back when we lived in Russia.

Today in the United States we celebrate Mother’s Day. There will be flowers, chocolates, homemade cards and phone calls to mothers. It is a day we set aside to celebrate and thank the incredible women who birthed and raised us. Mother’s Day is a beautiful thing.

But I have to be honest. I think we sell Mother’s Day a bit short.

Motherhood is worth celebrating.

I will celebrate today with thankfulness at the two little kids in my home. (One of them keeps interrupting this blog post to show me the newest snail he found in the backyard.) Their early morning cuddles, the way I can calm their fears just by holding them, their hilarious thoughts and creative ways of seeing the world. I can not imagine life without them. My children are the best parts of me.

I smile with joy for the friends who get to celebrate their very first Mother’s Day this year. The new babies that this year has brought to sweet friends who spent years longing for them. Happy Mother’s day new mamas. Soak in every drop.

I will honor all the women around me who mother so well. The ones with healthy families, the ones whose children require extra care, the women who look after other’s children as if they were their own. All the women who are brave enough to love a child unconditionally. Especially my own mom – who deserves her own theme song and fireworks to follow her.

Today is also a day with streaks of sadness.

I think about the baby I lost in between my daughter and my son. I wonder what he or she would have been like and who they would have grown into. All the bedtime stories I didn’t get to read and all the evenings snuggling on the couch doing nothing but simply being together. Today there are multitudes of women like me – who ache for the children that are no longer with them on this earth.

Each morning I think about the two children we are adopting from Burundi. Today is the fourth Mother’s Day I will have spent waiting for them to join our family. Gritting my teeth and praying that by this time next year they will be here with me. Fighting the lie that this is one more year lost. So many women feel that way today. One more year gone without the child they were hoping for.

Mother’s Day to me is not so much about honoring the role of mom, but about celebrating the capacity of the women to be mothers.

I have seen motherhood in action and it is a powerful thing. Professionals who advocate and fight for the rights of minors. Moms who sit beside their autistic children refusing to let a diagnosis define them. Nurses who care for the sick and dying. Businesswomen who support projects to improve the lives of others around the world. Those who spend their days intentionally loving and giving despite their own needs. Not all of these women have their own children, but they encompass the definition of motherhood so well.

” Motherhood: is 24/7 on the frontlines of humanity.” – Maria Shriver

To the women who are knee deep in laundry or college tuition bills – thank you for raising kids. For giving them your hours, your bodies and your hearts.

To the women who are meeting today with the ache of loss – thank you for loving so deeply even though it caused you pain.

To the women still filled with longing for the kids you don’t have – I see you. Thank you for not giving up.

There is so much to celebrate today beyond the high-five to the mom in the park (although, that would totally make my day).

Take time to notice the women around you. The women who selflessly pour into children that will never call them “mom”. The ones who will courageously attend another baby shower for a friend even though it rubs on the tender place of disappointment within them. The women who give their days and nights to wiping noses and taking care of their own kids needs. These women are all worth celebrating and support the broader meaning of motherhood. They spend their lives on the frontlines of humanity. They are mothers in their own right.

So to all the women who mother – physically, emotionally, spiritually. This one’s for you babe. Happy Mother’s Day.

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8 Comments

Filed under Adoption, Kiddos, My Life Thus Far, Uncategorized

8 responses to “Mother’s Day. Why I will celebrate and why I will cry.

  1. What a beautiful post. Thank you and Happy Mother’s Day to you. ❤

  2. Jessi

    Absolutely love this post for so many reasons! Here’s to all the amazing women out there who love others with the heart of a mother. Happy Mother’s Day ladies! It’s such a beautiful day to reflect on the awesome gift God has given each of us to be mothers…whether by birth, adoption, fostering, or through spiritual roles. He has given us such a great capacity to guide others towards His great love and raise them up in His word. Enjoy this day!

  3. This is perfect. Thank you for this! I know so many mamas who are rejoicing in their lovely little children today and also grieving for the ones they have lost or have yet to bring into this world. This post is encouraging to all women everywhere! Thank you!

  4. On Mother’s Day, I posted this on my FB page, “As a little girl, I would lay in bed and ask Jesus if I could one day have a family of my own– to be a wife and a mother. There is a grief in my heart today at a dream that still lingers and I won’t cover it in shame. And while my heart is broken at what I don’t have, it is also full with the love of children who call me Titi Holly, Aunt Holly, Miss Holly & Howly. Each one holds a special place in my heart and I cherish their hugs and kisses.” Thank you for understanding that Mother’s Day can be difficult for some. For many reasons. I wish more people got that.

  5. I struggle a lot with some women who simply throw pity parties on Mother’s Day and completely ignore the mothers they have while focusing solely on self. Because of that, I’ve struggled to find a good balance between recognizing the hurt women who have suffered infertility, miscarriages, loss of a child, abortions, while still celebrating the moms we have and the life they bring. This post really helps open my eyes and point me in a new direction. Thanks of the insight 🙂

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